Shanghai Night Life Part IV

I like lizards.

So who's been to Phebe yet?

If not....go there! If you have then check out Fuxing park.

Anyone remember Club Lady Gaga?

Richy: Typical Chinese club. (Fuxing park)

Not many foreigners, pretty standard Chinese club meaning there are about 10 million tables and chairs and then a small dance floor.....even though its a small dance floor this club is still pretty cool.

The club is great for finding Chinese girls and just generally having fun, its close to a few other clubs so its a good place to hang around as you can bounce to other places quickly and easily.

Drinks are ok priced.

Park 97: A bizzare bizzare place. (fuxing park)

Two levels and many many tables.....

I've never seen it totally packed but then again its never really empty.....

Security are pushy and a little retarded, the club has lots of Chinese people and not many foreigners (this seems to be the case with Fu xing park) its mainly commerical boring music and I haven't personally had a fantastic or memorable time there, yet (still hoping).

It's worth checking out but not worth spending the night at.

Not sure about the drinks.

Guandi: Its famous...(fuxing park)

I've been here a few times, its almost always empty which leads me to believe its a late late late night club (4am-ish)

It's trendy and occasionally attracts some people from the Shanghai dance crews....it can be a little hit and miss though because its rarely consistent with the music.

Check it out or dont.....

Not sure about the drinks.

I will cover more clubs (Xin tian Di - complete coverage) in the next post.

Small dive bars/clubs:

Windows underground

C's

Everything else in between: 

Mural

Windows too

Brown sugar

Davidoff lounge

Tipsy...

LADDDDDDYYYYYYYY GAGA. (watch out for this one)

Thanks for reading my rant on Shanghai clubs, I hope you love it.

Peace

Kane

Shanghai Night Life Part III

Hey, I'mmmmmm back.

Anyone been to Lady Gaga? That place is unreal.

Here we go:

Muse 1: ohhhhhhhh damn.

I love this place, this place is totally chill. (Xi kang lu crossing Yu yao lu)

Muse is a great place because its balanced, you have 2 decent sized dance floors (it's 3 levels), 3 bars and its a perfect mix of Foreigners and Chinese 30/70.

Friday nights has good music, generally hip hop and they generally have dancers and MC's/Black dudes rapping or beat boxers.

Saturday is more house or just commerical remixed hip hop.

Always a good place to find girls who are friendly towards foreigners and speak reasonable English.

The 3rd level is private rooms with private service.

Drinks aren't too expensive.

Muse 2: ummmmmmmmmm...yeah...

Basically just a bigger M1 without the 2nd dance floor.

There are A LOT of tables, again same crowd and its a little classier......It is usually too crowded, you have to battle your way through to get anywhere on the busy nights which is a pain in the ass.

The dance floor is a death trap, its a few raised blocks and if you fall if there is a good chance of death.

Other than that, its all right.

Drinks are more expensive than muse 1.

Sky:  Oh...HbSichuan.....

Sky is a wonderful place, its right next to Muse 1 and you can sneak into both of them by going around the back and either going in through the fire exit to get into Sky or use the elevator to get into Muse.

Sky has TABLES, they recently just filled up half the dance floor with tables.....which is kinda crappy but there is still enough of a dance floor to have a good time.

Alcohol is well (correction - 40rmb gets you an orange juice with a spit of vodka in it - RUBBISH) priced, the place is really well run and managed, security is good and everything goes smoothly.

It does get pretty packed on weekends, Friday night is Hip hop, Saturday is house and commercial stuff.

Phebe: I love this place, so much.

Phebe is/was/still sorta is the bomb.

Again it recently got raped (yes raped) with tables, despite that its still a great place....onto why its a great place:

It's a Chinese club.....and it has some Foreigners....it also has some class.

There is mini golf, a Lady playing Piano (that sadly no one can hear) and many cool events/dance things/shows they hold inside.

There is the Lesbian act where two Chinese girls in a shower mimic sex with a dude (they're wearing clothes).

The Michael Jackson act : Some Chinese dude pretends to do some MJ moves...then pulls off most of his clothing and does some sorta gay belly dancing thing and generally prances around....its amusing.

They have a few other shows and other things going on which keep it interesting....

They also have Drink girls (girls who drink with you if you pay them), hookers and everything else in between.

I love Phebe because something magic always happens there, I've met models, ABC's and all sorts here, I've had some of my favourite clubbing experiences here.

Drinks are ok priced.

All the clubs are pretty close to each other (10 mins or so by Taxi) and its easy to travel around as there are Taxi's at all hours.

I hope this clears some stuff up for you guys.

Seriously check out Phebe, even if you don't prefer Chinese clubs, you will like Phebe.

Peace

Kane

Shanghai Night Life Part II

I asked my main main in Shanghai, Kane Vast to finish off this series since Shanghai is his stomping ground.  He willingly agreed to help me out and I'm really thankful for that because he'll be able to give you way better insider knowledge of the scene than I can.

When I originally asked him to put something together he wrote THOUSANDS of words, so I've decided to break it up into some smaller chunks for easy consumption.

Anyway, enough of me, let's get to what you really want to know...

--

Hey RPQ asked me to drop by and give my 2 yuan on Shanghai night life.

To start it all off.....

Shanghai has everything...........from clean and classy to dark and dirty.

Shanghai gives you choice.

Shanghai is everything good, bad and awesome all mixed together.

Starting with dinner....

Shanghai has every restaurant, cuisine and scary dish you could imagine....whatever you can think of, we've got it (yes that includes house pets). (anywhere from 100 rmb for 3 people to 1000 depending which restaurant u go to)

It's a great city to start out eating something awesome for dinner (Xin jiang food for example - Lou shan guan lu) and then moving onto a lounge for some fancy cocktails (Xintian di and Tian zi fang are fantastic, expensive but classy) or even an ice bar, the next step is to then hit up one of Shanghai's many clubs......

 

We've got world famous clubs and world famous DJ's....and then we've got everything else on the dark side of night life that you could think of.

I'm into the Clubs and DJ's so thats what you're gonna hear about from me.

Drink price ranges are described in three ways.

Expensive: 100 rmb for a drink (vodka and coke) is expensive and its most likely the alcohol is real.

Ok: 40 to 70rmb is an ok price and there is a good chance its real.

Cheap: 10 to 30 rmb is cheap and you're getting either really cheap rubbish alcohol or fake alcohol (some clubs here are famous for fake alcohol)

We're going to remember a few key points about China here:

1. Bars/Clubs are there to make money, not to look after you or get involved in your problems, meaning if you get drunk or into a fight you will not receive help from bouncers, they will watch 20 Chinese dudes beat you down and not do a damn thing to help.

2. Almost all major clubs have girls who are paid to drink with you, a lot the clubs have hookers./

These are pretty easy to spot because there will be a table full of girls who aren't drinking much and are all sitting there on their phones looking bored.

3. Chinese people overall are friendly.....do keep in mind that the personal space thing is non existent here so being pushed and shoved is normal and means you shouldn't start fights over it (no matter how god damn annoying it is) because you wont win.

Here we go

I'm going to break this down into types: (I will post about the dive bars, other clubs that i didn't mention here and anything  else i missed next time)

Big commercial clubs:

Club Obama: Club Obama opened with a bang.....and then fizzled. (Yan an xi lu)

It is huge, it is classy and it is over done.

I went there for the opening night and it was crazy, the club is well set up with a theater like setting with chairs surrounding the dance floor which is in the middle of the room.

It occasionally draws famous DJ's and has a generally mixed crowd of Chinese and Foreigners....the problem is that the club isn't close to the central part of Shanghai night life (Xintian Di area) and that makes it not as popular.

Mostly house/techno music.

Drinks are exxxxxxxxxpensive.

Circus: Circus Circus Circus....... (Yan an xi lu)

This place is either really awesome or really crap.

It's above Obama and seems to suffer from the location problem a little but it also makes up for it by having dancers and other forms of entertainment (lots and lots of girls you can pay to sit down and drink with you).

It draws a crowd of both Chinese and Foreigners...most foreigners mostly.

The dance floor is again in the middle of the room, they mostly have techno, house or remixes of Hip hop.

Drinks are ok priced.

Bar 88: Hookers, Lady boys, Drunk Chinese.

Bar 88.....It's everything awesome and terrible all mixed in one, there are lady boys, prostitutes and more all cruising around this bar, lots of tables (an INSANE amount) and an ok sized dance floor, always fun because of the constant insanity.

There are a lot of drunk Chinese people and a good mix of Foreigners chucked in....it is usually busy and its above ground level (long long stairs to get up) which is amusing when you're watching drunk people come down.

Drinks aren't over the top but not too cheap either.

The intro and brief hit up on three clubs should keep you busy!

Another post with alllllllot more club information on the way (Big commercial clubs and others continued next time).

Peace

--

Thanks for dropping by, Kane.

We'll have the next post up in about a week so look for it.

Want to Get Better With Women? There AreTwo Simple Ways to Put the Odds in Your Favor

There is so much information out there about meeting women and dating.  There's complete stories for you to repeat, games you can play, concepts to master, etc.

BUT, it really comes down to two things, and everything about picking up and dating women is at essence about these two things.  When you know and understand what these two things are, you can improve your success rate much more easily than most guys can.

Most guys who are learning this stuff want to know EVERYTHING.  In fact you're probably reading this because you're a logical guy who wants to know how to get from point A to point D and doesn't want to step out the door until you have full color map with all the detours highlighted in yellow so that you'll be ready for any and every contingency.

Unfortunately, what that means is that you're still sitting at home rather than having a great time with the ladies.  Whatever your level of skill with women is now, you can have more success just based on simple math.

Here it is, the first thing you need to do to improve your success with women:

1) Increase the total number of interactions you have with women

What a relief, right?  Because what it means, is that whatever your level of skill is with women right now, there are some that you could have success with.  Trust me on this.

Even the lamest of the lame guys get laid occasionally.  So you have to get out there and meet more women.  If you do that and nothing else, you will have more success--more phone numbers, more dates, and more sex.  You can't not--it's simple math.

And now the second thing:

2) Increase the effectiveness of each interaction

I'm talking about increasing those percentages, so that instead of 100 interactions to get 1 number, you only need 50 to get 1, and then 20 to get 1.  I'm talking about improving so that instead of 50 phone numbers to get one date, you only need 30, or only 10.

And most deliciously of all, going from needing to go on dates with 30 women to have sex with 1, you can reduce that number to 10 or even 5. I bet that would make dating a lot more exciting for you, wouldn't it?

You need a two pronged attack. 

When my father was a kid, he used to tell my grandmother that he was worried about becoming perfect.  Her answer, "No danger".

Instead of worrying about being perfect, go out there and put those numbers in your favor.  Because you can have more success if you change nothing at all about yourself, and with even small improvements you can make that success come faster.

Quick Tips for Meeting Women #8: Change Her Mood Not Her Mind

There's the old pickup community saw, "change her mood, not her mind".  The foundation for this saying is that people's actions are dictated way more by their emotional states than by any adherence to values or beliefs.

This is why people consistently break their diets, their exercise regimen, are late to work, or do anything that is against what they think is rationally in their best interest.

This is why non-verbal communication is much more powerful. It's way easier to make someone laugh by tickling them than it is by telling them a joke.

Also, verbal communication sits in the more logical regions of the brain--especially if you've got her talking to you in English rather than her native language. Speaking in a non-native language tends to take away the emotional anchors to the words(as an example, you'd probably find it way easier to talk dirty in Korean/Japanese/Chinese than in your native English) because there are no emotional anchors attached to the words outside of your native language.

Shanghai Night Life: Part I

It's been a few months since I was last in Shanghai, but a friend of mine is planning on going there to party and asked me for some tips on the scene.  So instead, of writing an e-mail that will benefit just one person, I thought I'd put it up here for everyone to see.

First off, the Shanghai scene is different from other scenes in Asia because the night spots are spread out all over the city.  Secondly, people tend to bounce around to 3 or 4 different venues on any given night out rather than picking a spot and staying there.

One of the really cool things about zipping around from venue to venue by taxi is that it makes bouncing a whole lot easier than the other cities I've been in like Tokyo, Osaka, Hong Kong, Singapore, Taipei and Seoul.

The Shanghai scene also gets started a bit earlier and dies down a bit earlier with a lot of people heading home around 3 or 4am, which in Japan and Korea are the most pumping-est times to be in the club.

On the whole, venues are smaller, and there are more lounge/bar type places and the western style clubs that are there tend to be smaller.  There are also a lot of Chinese style clubs.

Chinese style clubs are more like really loud, dark lounges with small dancefloors.  Most of the time people go there with a large group of friends(like 10 or more).  These social circles are usually guys who have invited their female "friends" out and are footing the bill for the table and drinks.  The guys tend to be pretty protective and it's hard to break into these groups without an "in".  So if you don't know anyone there it's tough, especially for westerners.

Asians seem to have more success with this.  However sometimes the girls will be standing nearby and then you can sometimes cherry pick and isolate them before the guys get involved.  If they do confront you, I find the best way to handle the situation is to be friendly and talk in the face of their hostile stare down and it won't escalate.  Also you get bonus points for being cool and chill while he's doing his try hard alpha show for the girls that he thinks makes him look cool when really the girls are just wondering what he's getting so bent out of shape about.

Because you'll be spending a lot of time in taxis and you probably don't speak Chinese, youre best off to use a service called Guanxi that allows you to text the name of the club, restaurant, bar, etc, you want to go to in English.  You'll get a text back with a selection of the possible places you mean; you select one, and then they send you the address.  You can get the address in Chinese too which you can then show to your taxi driver: 95882929

There's also a free English language call-in service you can use instead(though I've never tried it myself): 962288

In Part II, I'll tell you where to go to chill out and soak in the good vibes as well as where to go to party it up with the cool kids:

Shanghai Night Life Part II

Quick Tip for Meeting Women #6: The Basics of Compliance

Whenever you request someone do something, they decide whether they value you and your relationship enough to go out of their way to do it.

It's generally a two way street in that the more compliance someone gives you, the more you're likely to give them and vice-versa. This is why we'd go much more out of our way for friends and family than we would for co-workers. 

At the same time you must recognize that different people have different compliance ladders(which is one reason that looking out for Indicators of Interest is a losers game, but more on that another time).

People considered to be "nice" will give you lots of compliance easily while for people who are "mean", even a small level of compliance is a huge leap.

You can do things during the Day1 to help build compliance and generally you should be building compliance throughout the sarge and throughout the relationship.

Even a little thing like asking a girl's name is requesting compliance. You ask for her name, she can choose to give it to you. She can choose to give you a bullshit answer or she could choose to ignore you.

Her giving you a bullshit answer is a higher level of compliance than her ignoring you and is infinitely easier to work with.  This is why if you talk to a girl for 20-30 minutes the chances of her showing up for a Day2 are significantly higher than if you only talk to her for 5 minutes--her spending time interacting with you is compliance.

So if you want to get girls to meet you for a Day2 you MUST concentrate on building a lot of compliance on the Day1.

Are You Motivationally Challenged?

When something is scarce the price of it goes up. And price, is shorthand for "the amount of work and effort people are willing to put in to acquire something".

Now here's the odd thing about how this works.

A few months back, I was in Hyehwa, an area in Seoul known for stage performances like dance, plays and musicals, with BlueMystery, and two Korean guys--Joker and L. Because this is an artsy area there are lots of people, especially women strolling around.

Tons of coffee shops line the streets too.

(Coffee shops are ubiquitous around college campuses here in Korea. I suppose because people don't want to study in the library?)

Anyway, the 4 of us are roaming the streets, checking out some of the street performances and hoping we'll run into some interesting girls.

There are tons of different areas with different vibes and atmospheres you can go to in Seoul, and though Gangnam is much maligned for being uppity and snooty, no one can deny that when it comes to looks(though it's often surgically assisted), the women are top notch.

The reality is, is that finding amazing women is tough. It's a needle in the hay stack kind of thing. You can meet some fantastic women along the way and have some serious good times with the less than perfect women though--I'm all for that.

So when I was in Hyehwa I gradually found myself thinking things like, "Maybe I should go and talk to that girl...she does have a nice smile."

In my world, this is a flashing Chinese bicycle cop siren.

Because I know that if I were in Gangnam, I wouldn't be thinking any maybes. I wouldn't be using a nice smile as a reason to open. The way it should work is that you see a woman and it's like getting sucked into an approach vortex of glory.

Let's talk about motivation for a minute here.

I used to think I was the laziest guy there ever was. My father used to talk to my mother about how it was impossible to get me to do more than just the bare minimum to get by, and my mother would always respond by saying, "At least we don't have to worry about him dying of a hear attack, dear."

One year in 9th grade, I turned in a research paper on the poet Stevie Smith for my literature class over a month late! Another time, I had to hand deliver a paper to my teacher's house in Philidelphia, 1.5 hours away from where I was in Washington, DC because I didn't finish it on time to give it to her before she left and if I mailed it, it would have gotten there after she was already back in DC.

So here I am this lazy guy, who used to only work about 20-30 hours per month when I started PickUp Asia. Then I started thinking that I'm working awfully hard for a lazy guy.

And then it finally hit me.

All our lives we're trained to believe that we should be able to motivate ourselves to do things that we really don't want to do and have absolutely no interest in doing. Things like homework, and chores, and piano practice(unless of course you like piano practice).

And it messes us up in the head because we lose the ability to recognize real motivation, which is everything that you actually do do in life that is not on autopilot(ie like zipping your pants zipper is on autopilot, or SHOULD be).

So there I am in Hyewha, surrounded by women who I'm trying to be motivated to approach by looking at their best qualities(as seen from afar) and I contrast that with being in Gangnam where there's the constant tractor beam effect of true motivation.

So as I was saying...a lot of guys don't like to go to a place like Gangnam. The women there grade hard, but for me as exciting as the actual achievement of success is(however you define success), the pursuit of it alone is rewarding.

Especially in the world of dating and relationships because there are a lot of checkpoints along the way.



Quick Tip for Meeting Women #5: "You're a Playboy!"

When a woman asks you if or accuses you of being a playboy this is a shit test.

She's testing to see how you respond and whether you will become uncomfortable and/or obviously lie to her by pleading with her to believe that you're not.

You see, by accusing you of being a playboy this gives her an easy way to eliminate you. "I can't date that guy, he's a playboy".

So how do you handle this? There are a few ways. One of the ultimate ways to pass this kind of shit test when a girl accuses you of being something is to say:

What do you like about _______ so much?

-OR-

What turns you on so much about ______?

For example:

Her: You're a playboy
You: What do you like about playboys so much?

Her: You're short.
You: What turns you on about short men so much?

Another way to handle it is to tell her straight:

Look, I just met you and already you're trying to marry me. Relax, are you always so uptight?

In the above example, you reframe the whole situation as her being uptight, but you could also imply that she has some ulterior(and less than noble) motive.

Her: What's your job?
You: Oh...you're one of those girls who's only into guys for their money.

If you're dating several girls and she accuses you of having a girlfriend, asks if you have a girlfriend or asks you HOW MANY girlfriends you have:

Her: You have a girlfriend, don't you?
You: I have 3(or however many) girlfriends, but I'm looking for number 4. I think you could be number 4.
Her: I don't want to be number 4(or I want to be number 1)
You: We'll maybe you can be number 3. Can you cook?

Do this only if she's shit testing you. If she's just asking an honest question and you don't have a girlfriend say no, but remember that most people consider any girl you're sleeping with to be your girlfriend so it often makes it EASIER if you call them your girlfriends.

Remember that all of these must be delivered in a fun way.  Mock seriousness, for exmaple, works well.

Quick Tip for Meeting Women #4: Planning Sexcalation Locations

In scheduling a girl for Karaoke for the Day2, you are trying to go straight for a Sexcalation Location(a place where sex can happen). Unless you gamed the girl really well, on the Day 1 to the point where she actually wanted to fuck you THAT DAY without triggering Anti-Slut Defense, she's going to need more comfort before she'll be willing to be fully isolated with you in an SL.

Start somewhere public that there could be no objection to(coffee shop, shopping, a park, etc.) and THEN move her to the SL later once you've built up enough comfort.

In the same way that women bring their friends for protection from doing what they want to do, but think they shouldn't women's ASD will be triggered if you set things up clumsily. Remember that it has to "just happen". If she agrees to go with you straight to a karaoke booth and the illusion of it "just happening" cannot be maintained.

Lead her to the sexcalation location after you've disengaged her critical factor(more on that later).